The Gold Room
1558 W. Sunset Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90026

A common misconception regarding Cinco de Mayo is the belief that it honors Mexico’s independence. In fact, it merely celebrates General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguín’s victory in the town of Puebla, which served to slightly delay the French army’s march toward Mexico City. This victory stands alongside the Alamo and the Oaxacan teacher’s strike of 2006 as one of the most successful slaughters in Mexican military history. Another common misconception regarding Cinco de Mayo is that the holiday should be celebrated on May 5th. In fact, as any astute observer of Mexican culture and language will tell you, Cinco de Mayo is on May 7th.

So, in celebration of this noble holiday, we visit Echo Park’s fabled Gold Room for an evening of Mexican culture at its finest. If one were to take a 1984 El Camino with a glistening neon purple undercarriage, chili pepper lights lining the windows, an airbrushed Virgin de Guadeloupe on the hood, and flames shooting out the exhaust, and then wave a magic wand to turn it into a bar, the Gold Room would be that bar. It is a magical place where a $1 tequila shot is expected as accompaniment for every beer, an old man in a gaucho hat offers you peanuts, popcorn and occasionally steak picado, and unlike most other Mexican bars in the neighborhood, our band of gringos can safely enter without causing all conversations to halt as the record needle lifts off a Julio Preciado album.

As usual, the casual debauchery starts around 9PM and gets really interesting by 10:00. Come for one drink, or stay for one too many. Bring anyone and everyone, and join us for a great time in the middle of the week. If you arrive early or late, look for the people having a damn good time (it’ll be us), or start having a damn good time on your own (we’ll find you).

Carpe Drink’em,

Alex, Damien, & Travis - WDBT Co-czars

"Democrazy is the destiny of humanity; freedom its indestructible arm."

-Benito Juárez

On the second to last dive bar for 2007, we’ll visit an establishment that as of yet remains untouched by the tour. Tucked into a small storefront along Sunset Blvd. in the heart of Echo Park, The Gold Room would be your friendly neighborhood Latino bar if you happened to live here.

Decked out with purple florescent lights, a plethora of mirrors, and gold painted trophies, this bar achieves a unique aesthetic akin to a downtown mexican tienda selling those plug-in Jesus devotionals with multi-colored fiber optic lights and psychedelic spinning backgrounds. The milieu is further reinforced by a nice man who promptly offers you a bowl of popcorn and peanuts after ordering your first drink. If you happen to stay for another round or two, a plate of tacos or a lovely soup with tortillas will most likely be placed at your fingertips. The gratis botanyas combined with the drink special of a $1 shot of decent tequilla (or vodka) with the purchase of a beer will keep any bar-goer fed and well lubricated through the night.

As usual, the casual debauchery starts around 9PM and gets really interesting by 10:00. Come for one drink, or stay for one too many. Bring anyone and everyone, and join us for a great time in the middle of the week. If you arrive early or late, look for the people having a damn good time (it’ll be us), or start having a damn good time on your own (we’ll find you).

Carpe Drink’em,

Alex, Damien, & Travis, WDBT Co-Czars

"A curse? A curse? Ha! Then curse me with the golden touch! Ha ha ha ha!"

- King Midas

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Little Joy
1477 Sunset Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90026 (Echo Park)

On a recent weeknight, a Czar found himself at the tail end of a miserable day. Work was hell, The Man shackled him down with Jury Duty, and a paternity test came back with undesirable results. Depressed and alone, the Czar turned to the only true comfort he knew in life: the dive bar, and was drawn to Little Joy more by the name than anything else.

Is the Little Joy a place for those with little joy in their own lives to drown their sorrows? Or is it a place that offers that much needed little sliver of joy in our postmodern lives? Are the pint glasses of Sierra Nevada and PBR half-full, or half-empty in this establishment? The Czar went, seeking answers, and salvation.

He settled into the bar stool and sipped on his cheap and well-proportioned Scotch & Soda, and was struck by the fact that one of the patrons had selected consecutive songs from "The Big Lebowski" on the eclectic jukebox. As the depressed Czar pondered precisely what condition his condition was in, he took note of the ambiance that Little Joy offered. A strict dress code of black and denim is followed by all regulars, with the only sources of bright color appearing in tattoos or hair. The walls on the inside of the joint are covered with graffiti that appears somewhat sanctioned by the bartenders, who chug Tecate behind the bar and as a result, mix progressively more potent but less reliably accurate drinks as the night rolls on. Schlitz Beer is available in a can* and the pint glasses have ads for Greyhound busses on them.

These observations put a smile on the depressed Czar’s face and, as he gazed down to find the Scotch & Soda he thought he’d finished, he realized it was, in fact, still half-full.

As usual, the casual debauchery starts around 9PM and gets really interesting by 10:00. Come for one drink, or stay for one too many. Bring anyone and everyone, and join us for a great time in the middle of the week. If you arrive early or late, look for the people having a damn good time (it’ll be us), or start having a damn good time on your own (we’ll find you).

Carpe Drink’em,

Alex, Damien, & Travis, WDBT Co-Czars

* A note to Dive Bar Troopers, "Little Joy" may be the only stop on this year’s tour when you can earn that elusive "Schlitz" Merit Badge!

"If’n you ain’t the grandaddy of all liars! The little critters of nature… They don’t know that they’re ugly! That’s very funny! A fly marrying a bumblebee. I told you I’d shoot! But you didn’t believe me! Why didn’t you believe me?!"

-Stinky Wizzleteats, "The Happy Happy Joy Joy Song"

Short Stop
1455 Sunset Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90026

In certain parts of LA, a bar with no identifying insignia beyond a neon “Cocktails” sign out front represents a trendy establishment trying to pass itself off as an old-timey watering hole for its hipster clientele buying $5 PBR in a can. Echo Park is, fortunately, not yet one of those parts of LA, and God-willing, as long as there is still crack to be sold and gang wars to be fought, it never will succumb to the vile forces of gentrification.

Granted, hipsters have made inroads into the neighborhood, and on certain nights, the Short Stop is invaded by an even more despicable breed: Dodgers fans, visiting from their nearby stadium before, after, and during games. However, WDBT devotees will recognize the Short Stop as home when the tamale salesman enters the bar each night and makes his rounds with a casual, “Hey…You wan a tamale?” From there, all that’s left to do is wash that tamale down with some more of the Short Stop’s fine selection of cheap beer, and declare the night a rousing success.

As usual, the casual debauchery starts around 9PM and gets really interesting by 10:00. With the Dodgers taking on the Rockies that night, we anticipate a packed house. Be sure to wear your Barry Bonds jerseys for added excitement. Come for one drink, or stay for one too many. Bring anyone and everyone, and join us for a great time in the middle of the week. If you arrive early or late, look for the people having a damn good time (it’ll be us), or start having a damn good time on your own (we’ll find you).

Carpe Drinkem,

Alex, Damien, & Travis, WDBT Co-Czars

“Hell of a situation we got here. Two on, two out, your team down a run and you’ve got the chance to be the hero on national television…if you don’t blow it. Saw you wife last night. Great little dancer. That guy she was with? I’m sure he’s a close personal friend, but tell me, what was he doing with her panties on his head?”

- Jack Tayler, Major League